Musictoob

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Jay Z and Beyonce are married

As predicted, Jay Z and Beyonce married at a ceremony on Friday night in Manhattan. Musictoob reported 37 year old Shawn Carter and the 26 year old Beyonce Knowles were set to tie the knot last week. The celebration was held at Jay Z’s volumnious TriBeCa apartment, where partygoers were told to leave their cell phones with their chauffeurs (it was that kind of party.) The guest of honour? Bling! Writes the Daily Mail: “All the women wore white and 50,000 white orchids were flown in from Thailand.” Who cares about your carbon footrpint on your special day? Together the hip hop/R n’B power couple are now worth close to $100 million. Congratulations.

Related News:

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• Beyonce does show for dictator’s son in shocking new pictures
• Kate Moss gets annihilated at London Fashion week
• Recovering alcoholic Ron Wood considers love nest with pub next door
• Jay Z is a massive diva

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Tags: BeyonceJay-ZMarriedNew York

2 Responses to “Jay Z and Beyonce are married”

1. Jay Z is a massive diva
   at 5:03 pm on September 25th, 2008

   [...] Jay Z has been learning how to take himself very seriously. Is this Beyonce’s doing? The woman who needs white linen laid out all over the floor and her staff to evaporate like snip-snappy genies whenever she appears lest their faces offend her. The Mirror newspaper reports on Jay Z’s prima donna issues recently witnessed in his Manhattan nightclub, 40/40. “A white throne was brought out and taken into his private Jay Room where he could chill on his oversized bed and watch a 60-inch plasma TV.” Well, you know what they say about men with big tellies. After this hilarious display of nonsense, a platter of buffalo wings [?]  was taken to him by his underlings. Just in case anyone didn’t understand the omnipresence that is Jay-Z, each time he walked through the club, a medley of his and Beyonce’s hits were played. I think this is a bit like when Patti Smith told Rolling Stone that she jerked off to her own photograph. Hip hop is gay Jay Z and Beyonce are married [...]

2. Musictoob Beyoncé’s new single heralds economic meltdown according to NYU professor
   at 1:14 pm on January 12th, 2009

   [...] up people. It’s Beyoncé versus the stock markets. Just in case nobody actually believes the world financial markets are in [...]

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